Enduring this time in history continues to require some significant GRIT—the willingness to Go Right Into Trepidation and sit in it. ‘This time’ actually refers to mid-February 2022 and the height of a protest in my nation’s capital city of Ottawa, Ontario, Canada. I attempted to complete this blog post then, but my emotions felt so tumultuous that I found myself completely stuck, unable to grasp enough clarity to express my thoughts in words. And, so, I have completed yet another post as slow as a snail….

For as long as I can remember, I have seen the world differently from almost everyone I know—and the older I get, the more acutely I feel this difference. In university, I studied rhetoric—the art of persuasion. That education included understanding theories of persuasion and the importance of symbols, including techniques used historically to manipulate people. Since then, I have seen the world through the lens of rhetoric. 

Through practice, I honed attention to detail and awareness of nuance into my own personal micropower. In 2003, when I escaped corporate business into my own small business venture, I chose the slogan “See Differently.”

I believe:

• Anything that “everybody knows” is worth further investigation.
• Our decisions should be based on information rather than assumption.
• We are all on a spiritual journey, whether we realize it or not.
• You have to believe it to see it.
• You create your universe.

It’s your life; make it a beautiful one.
Namaste!

Today, I continue to recognize that we all see the world through the lens of language, whether we realise it or not. The words we choose and hear matter. I have listened closely to the words chosen by those in power during this pandemic with dismay, disbelief, and eventually with shock and dread. I have applied rhetorical theories like Kenneth Burke’s Theory of Identification and the Scapegoat to the circumstances playing out around me; this theory states that people seek safety and identification based on coming together in opposition to a common enemy—this chosen enemy becomes the scapegoat for all of their ills and grievances.

Leviticus 20:22, Holy Bible, New International Version:

20 When Aaron has finished making atonement for the Most Holy Place, the tent of meeting and the altar, he shall bring forward the live goat. 21 He is to lay both hands on the head of the live goat and confess over it all the wickedness and rebellion of the Israelites—all their sins—and put them on the goat’s head. He shall send the goat away into the wilderness in the care of someone appointed for the task. 22 The goat will carry on itself all their sins to a remote place; and the man shall release it in the wilderness.

In early January 2022, a friend sent me a link to a televised interview with the leader of my country, in which he stated that anyone who has chosen not to get the Covid shot is an ‘anti-vaxxer.’ He stated (translated from French): “They are extremists who don’t believe in science, they’re often misogynists, also often racists…. It’s a small group that muscles in, and we have to make a choice in terms of leaders, in terms of the country. Do we tolerate these people?”

Watching this interview, listening to these words—the words of the person leading my country—literally sent me into a state of shock and trepidation for several days, in which I walked around like a zombie and actually found myself rocking back and forth in my chair. Why did it matter so much to me? Because I am the scapegoat he referred to in the interview. 

I am and always will be pro-choice. I believe each individual has an inalienable right to choose what they believe to be in their best interest. I believe everyone is born with the right to decide what happens to their bodies, including what they put into it or choose to avoid putting into it. And I exercised that right when I chose not to get the Covid shot—and I made the choice based on science, real science.

noun: 

1. small loose particles of stone or sand.
2. courage and resolve; strength of character.

verb:

1. move with or make a grating sound.

I’ve lived a very privileged life as a white, middle-class person in a highly developed and prosperous country. I used to very egotistically consider my country to be one of the very best—one of the most tolerant, progressive, peace-keeping, and ‘right-minded’ countries in the world. Recent events have humbled that opinion considerably. Until recently, in this lifetime anyway, I had never experienced open prejudice or segregation. Never. I had never found myself in an ostracized minority of any kind. This experience has been eye-opening. I have gained an understanding and empathy for people who have experienced prejudice that I simply could not relate to previously—perhaps intellectually, but not on an emotional level, which is where true empathy lives. Saying this, I fully recognize that I experienced this prejudice as a non-visible minority, which is much easier than experiencing it as a visible one—I could hide my status most of the time.

Outside of a very small, select group of kindred spirits with whom I share the same views, I have done my best to keep my choices, and the opinions associated with them, to myself during these contentious times. Keeping my mouth shut has proven a heavy burden. Even in my own home, I bite my tongue regularly, and when I don’t, I often regret it. That attempt at silence has come at the steep price of loneliness, isolation, alienation, and significant doses of despair. At what point does the price required to ‘stay on good terms’ with everyone—to remain polite and submissive at all times, no matter how grievously I disagree with their opinions, no matter how uncomfortable it feels—become too steep a ransom to continue to dole out? At this point.

I will not lower myself to defend why I am not an extremist, misogynist, or racist—those accusations are truly absurd. My Prime Minister also stated that I “don’t believe in science.” This statement is also completely untrue, but perhaps the only accusation worthy of a response: 

I have always sought knowledge; from a young age, I have been an avid reader of nonfiction, particularly in the subjects of spirituality, health, and well-being. For years, I have actually been quite obsessed with health-related information. It started as a teenager when my family sought to improve our health through a strict diet—we purchased and I read a multitude of books that promised optimal health. When, instead of becoming healthier, I became increasingly unwell on the expounded diet, it led me to investigate further. I learned the hard way that much of the information presented emphatically in those books as ‘fact’ and ‘proven science’ was actually only opinion and theory—theory that I disproved through my own bodily experiment. It took me years to recover from that experiment, and my recovery occurred in spite of the medical care I received, not through it—it happened when I finally took full responsibility for my own health journey.

When I became pregnant with my first child, someone casually suggested to me that there could be health concerns with childhood vaccines and perhaps I should investigate them. I did—with my usual level of intense interest. I read a multitude of books on the subject and countless articles. I became so immersed in the subject that I wrote fact sheets on it for a Canadian non-profit, pro-choice organization.

When a dear family member began treatment for cancer, I delved into understanding cancer treatments and inadvertently discovered that many effective treatments and actual cancer cures have been vehemently suppressed and replaced with patented pharmaceutical options that make corporations and the healthcare industry billions of dollars, but simply do not work.

The deeper I delved into different areas of the subject of how to be healthy, the more I discovered, to my amazement, that it is rampant with opposing theories, discordant views, personal and collective bias, blatant misinformation, statistical tampering, skewed studies, corporate lobbying and greed. My education in rhetoric—in understanding the art of persuasion through language—equipped me well to identify false arguments and emotional manipulation.

Based on what I consider a resulting very healthy distrust of pharmaceutical-dominated mainstream medicine, I subscribe to a number of alternative health information sources that have earned my trust over the last twenty years and I choose alternative approaches to healthcare whenever possible. When I was asked to inject a fast-tracked, unapproved, minimally tested, experimental gene therapy into my body, I said ‘no.’ Emphatically. And, quite frankly, I assumed that most other people would too. Goodness knows, I was in for a surprise.

Based on my choice to say ‘no’ in the face of most other peoples’ willingness to say ‘yes’ to this medical intervention, I have experienced a loss of freedom. I lost the freedom to eat at a restaurant or go to the theatre. I’ve missed funerals and seeing dear friends who live afar. I’ve been politely excused from functions. I was less politely un-invited to a party by close friends who stated, “we know you’re unvaccinated and other people coming know it too”—despite, as I mentioned earlier, my choice to keep my non-compliance almost completely to myself. I’ve gritted my teeth through countless comments and full-out rants from personal and business acquaintances, and even strangers, extolling the virtues of ‘doing the right thing’ and the evils of the irresponsible and selfish people like me who are endangering everyone. Perhaps you believe that I deserve every one of these slights. So be it. You have a right to your opinion. Yet, I’m still not buyin’ it. I must and I will continue to follow my own intuitive, inner knowingness, even when it leads me to a lonely place.

And, based on the government’s decision to mandate the Covid jab, I have a number of friends, all of whom are highly educated, who have lost their livelihoods—not just ‘jobs,’ but established, successful careers—because they too said ‘no.’ Some of them are healthcare workers, some university employees and professors. Believe it or not (although it often feels like it), I’m not alone in the opinion that the risks of this shot outweigh the benefits. People willing to risk their family’s financial stability and their professional reputations in order to protect their personal health, bodily autonomy, and right to choose—these people have certainly demonstrated GRIT. 

In fact, many doctors, scientists, and experts in fields that afford them very knowledgeable opinions on this subject, believe—based on an ever-expanding body of sound scientific data—that this shot does far more harm than good. And many of them have jeopardized their careers, the well-being of their families, and their own safety (no, I’m not exaggerating) for speaking out about it. But, you likely haven’t heard about them because social media platforms and the mainstream media have aggressively censored them. They have been censored, not only for messages targeted as ‘misinformation,’ but for any messages perceived as contributing to ‘vaccine hesitancy,’ even when proof of the accuracy of the facts within the message is acknowledged. Yet, these people have continued to speak out despite being targeted and defamed. Now, that’s GRIT.

For my part, do I regret my decision? Absolutely not. Would I make the same choice again? Absolutely. Even if I am completely alone in my choice. Even if my rights and freedoms were to be severely restricted as a result. The phrase ‘over my dead body’ emotes how strongly I reject what I wholeheartedly believe to be this unsafe, ineffective medical intervention. 

Standing firm in my conviction feels more comfortable now than when I started writing this post—speaking my truth has truly liberated me from the emotional angst associated with it, though it definitely required a willingness to Go Right Into Trepidation and sit in it for a while. Attempting to ignore, suppress, or resist the uncomfortable feelings did indeed prove futile. Accepting the discomfort is part and parcel of ‘seeing differently’ and the reason I created PACTS—Powerful Acts of Consciousness, Truth, and Sovereignty. And, the more I find the courage to calmly state my viewpoint from my perspective without hesitation or apology, the more kindred spirits appear to me, who just happen to align with it. Together, we seek peace and I remember that I am not alone. Freedom lives here.